ConversationswitCoyfee

Archive for the ‘What is True Love?’ Category

ConversationswitCoyfee presents A Man’s Point Of View: Why Women Cheat

In A Man's Point Of View, A man's Version of the Dating Game, Adulterous women, Ask the black man, Dating and the Single Woman, Uncategorized, What is True Love?, Why Women Cheat on August 30, 2009 at 4:20 am

Well folks what do you say? Do you agree with the writer? Why do women cheat? Is it that some women want their cake and to eat it too..

Let me know what you think?

Coyfee signing off

 

A Man’s Response To Why Women Cheat Posted Aug 18

So, I’m reading this article on the ‘Hello Beautiful’ site titled, 3 Reasons Why Women Cheat, and I have decided to give you women some advice based on what I have read:

 Feeling Lonely in a Relationship

Ok, realize that men sometimes go through this as well so it’s not gender based when it comes to feeling lonely. The expectations placed on a man while in a relationship should be discussed as opposed to being expected, ESPECIALLY if your man happens to be popular or very driven when it comes to his career or work. If you are feeling lonely, it is up to you to include him in other activities that he may not normally be involved in where you wouldn’t feel so lonely. Also, keep in mind that, just like women, guys like to hang out with the fellas every now and then, so if your expectations are greater than he is willing to give, then you may have to resort to the infamous female support group! Otherwise, occupy your time with your passion and goals so that way when the two of you DO get up, the time together will be cherished even more while both of you are trying to achieve personal goals and dreams!

 

Feeling Taken for Granted

 As stated above, men go through the motions when feeling like they are also taken for granted. But instead of focusing on the negative, focus on the positive and as with any relationship, whether work, play or friendship, this can be a task. But as with any task, there has to be common ground so that it can be completed to satisfaction! What most women tend to do is focus on their needs and themselves when having a conversation about ‘us’. You also need to be open to hearing and catering to his needs and wants as well so that way BOTH of you can be equally fulfilled! I hate to word it like this but, it has to be a mutually binding agreement so that way no one feels taken for granted, you give a little, I give a little and hopefully, we both benefit greatly!

 

You Are Leading Separate Lives

Well, as with anything in life, you grow, sometimes together, sometimes apart. It should be the focus of both partners to extend themselves to each other so that way both of you are still on the same page when it comes to a common bond which should be love. We can’t help who we are or who we become based on life experiences and what most women (and men!) don’t understand is that it is BECAUSE of you that he decides to take another direction in life, whether negative or positive. We should make each other stronger but at times, we tend to get weak out of being used to being with the one we are with, so we can and do get complacent. So, communication may be the most important tool in this situation so you can understand what the other is going through in order to want to stay in each others live! You can lead a separate, yet together life if both parties are getting what they want out of it, specifically on an emotional level. But you MUST discuss it with each other!

 

Revenge Can Be Bittersweet

This is definitely a hard thing for women and ESPECIALLY men! Since society accepts cheating men more than they accept cheating women, we, as men, are distraught when we find out that our woman has cheated, even if we were caught first. Hey, don’t blame us; society has made it acceptable for us to get away with cheating! Nonetheless, if it’s within a marriage, when you take your vows, you said for better or for worse, so you must remember that when you do find out as we, as men, have to think along the same lines. As far as a lover, I would say it should be based on what is transpiring in the relationship as to why the cheating was done and if it can be, not only forgiven, but placed aside for the good of the relationship.

 

The Ego Needs Stroking

As far as ego, I can safely say that the male ego is more robust than a woman’s ego, so we are at a disadvantage when it comes to that, especially if we are attractive or have a status or have money or have all three! Women are always eyeing us, trying to get our attention and with the slightest bit of neglect from you, make it easier to submit to the desires of a woman who is obviously trying to give us the goods. So, if anything, if our egos need stroking, guess what, something else of ours will get the stroking.

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ConversationswitCoyfee presents A Tragedy:Wedding Con Victim Has Long Island Ties

In A man's Version of the Dating Game, Uncategorized, Violence Against Women, Wedding Con Victim Has Long Island Ties, What is True Love?, women talk on August 18, 2009 at 1:26 am

Hi everyone! I hope your weekend was restful but adventurous.  I would like to share this story with you and ask for your opinions.  I still daydream of a man taking care of me and treating me like the Queen that I am.  I guess I am not the only one that day dreams of such a fairytale ending…

Coyfee signing off…..

 

Wedding Con Victim Has Long Island Ties 

Man took over $400,000 from two New York women

 Rose Marie Anglade is shown at her home in Miramar, Fla., Wednesday, Aug. 12, 2009. A 55-year-old South Florida man allegedly swindled some $400,000 from Anglade and another New York woman he was engaged to at the same time. (AP Photo/Miami Herald, Lillly Echeverria)By Jennifer Kay, Associated Press Writer

The used car salesman seemed just like the big shot teenager Rose Marie Anglade knew in Haiti.

Paul Francois owned his dealership and property in Miami’s Little Haiti, and he parked a fleet of flashy luxury cars in front of a suburban home worth half a million dollars. “I just need someone to get married to,” he crooned to Anglade when the old acquaintances from Port-au-Prince met again in 2007.

She thought their unexpected reunion was just what she needed: Someone to take care of her, as a single mother with a son in the Army and a daughter fresh out of high school.

Instead, police say, Francois took Anglade for everything she had — while he was swindling another Haitian immigrant he had also promised to marry. He allegedly stole some $400,000 from the two New York women.

Francois, 55, of Davie, was being held Thursday on $125,000 bond at the Broward County jail on fraud and theft charges. A lawsuit Anglade filed against Francois in September 2008 also is pending.

Anglade, 50, was overjoyed to see Francois’ mug shot posted online after his arrest Wednesday. His sweet talk had left her penniless and facing eviction from the Miramar house she had bought with him, she said in a phone interview Thursday.

The dental office assistant from the Astoria section of Queens in New York went to Florida on vacation in 2007 to celebrate her daughter’s graduation. She had left Haiti for New York 30 years earlier, and she wanted to see the cultural heart for Haitians in Miami. A stroll through the neighborhood brought her to Francois’ dealership, and she recognized him instantly.

The pair talked by phone every night after Anglade returned to New York. She soon began flying back to Miami every two weeks to be with Francois.

“He told me, ‘I’m going to marry you, you won’t need to go to work,’ because he had the business,” she said. “It was, ‘Honey, honey, honey,’ every day.”

He persuaded her to sell her home and buy a house in Florida from his brother, who was behind on his mortgage, according to the arrest affidavit. Then they opened a joint account, where she deposited more than $287,000 — her savings plus the proceeds from the sale of her New York home.

When Anglade gave Francois a $17,500 check for the mortgage, he deposited it into his own account and then forged her signature on other checks as he emptied their joint account, police said. Anglade said she didn’t know Francois was stealing from her until she bounced a check in October 2007. The bank informed her that the joint account was overdrawn.

“He told me that he moved the money because he was afraid that I wouldn’t like Florida and would take the money back with me to New York,” Anglade said. “He never denied it.”

Anglade also didn’t know that while she was abandoning her life in New York to join Francois, he was wooing another woman.

“He had one week for me and then one week for her,” Anglade said. “He was engaged to both of us.”

Sheila Brissault of Elmont, N.Y., said she was introduced to Francois by his brother, a New York City cab driver, in June 2007. Brissault told authorities that over the phone, Francois claimed to be a real estate agent and persuaded the nurse from Jacmel, Haiti, to come to Florida with $50,000 for a down payment on a home.

When she visited Florida, Francois allegedly persuaded her to apply for a $50,000 line of credit on her New York home and open a joint account with him.

The 43-year-old Brissault, also a single mother with a daughter graduating high school, said she trusted Francois because he produced the right documents and told her he was looking for a wife.

“He kept talking,” she said by telephone from New York. “I thought I would never get married until my daughter graduated, and when I met this man was exactly when my daughter graduated.”

She discovered she had been swindled after Francois asked her to sell her Long Island home. She didn’t, but he had already cleaned out the joint account, according to the arrest affidavit.

Brissault and Anglade told authorities that Francois threatened them each with violence when they demanded he return their money. Anglade said Francois punched her in the face after one confrontation. Brissault said Francois threatened to kill her and her children.

“He’s nice until he gets the money, then immediately he turns into the werewolf,” said Joe Pappacoda, the attorney representing both women.

Francois’ attorney, Leonard Fenn, did not immediately return phone or e-mail messages Thursday.

Anglade and her 20-year-old daughter still live in their foreclosed Florida home, pawning belongings to pay the bills and relying on handouts for grocery money. Anglade is unemployed, and said Francois intended to leave her homeless with no way to support herself.

He sold cars, but he wouldn’t give her one to look for a job, she said.

“He said he loved me so much, he just didn’t want me to go anywhere by myself, so no car for me,” said Anglade . “He said, ‘Oh, honey, those people in Florida are no good.’ He just didn’t want me to talk to no one so I wouldn’t know what was going on with him.”

Copyright 2009 The Associated Press.

ConversationswitCoyfee presents Ask The Black Man:Can A Man Wait Until Marriage To Have Sex?

In A Man's Point Of View, A man's Version of the Dating Game, Ask the black man, Black Church, Can A Man Wait Until Marriage To Have Sex?, How to successfully date, Uncategorized, What is True Love?, women talk on August 15, 2009 at 1:18 am

Good morning! I hope your week is progressing in a productive manner.. I have a old topic with a new spin for discussion..Waiting until marriage. Does anyone do that anymore? It’s sort of hard when there is so much divorce and maybe having other men/women to compare your new lover to is the root of the problem.  You tell me..

Below the Black Man addresses a young woman who has chosen to wait to have sex until married ..Let’s see what he has to say about this spicy topic…

Have a great weekend..

Coyfee signing off….

 

Can A Man Wait Until Marriage To Have Sex?

Posted Aug 13

Hello Blackman, I am a 21-year-old African American Christian woman who is saving herself for marriage. Quite frankly, I feel like I am one of the last of a dying breed of excellent women. It seems to be hard to find a good black man who appreciates me for who I am. What man wants to deal with a girl who won’t satisfy his sexual needs until after marriage? CD

 

The Blackman: Hi CD, I think the way society is designed these days it is tough to find that match. It is not impossible though. Just like anything else, once you find something great you should cherish it. Society has transformed a lot throughout the years where pre-marital sex is not looked at as taboo anymore. In some ways it has helped certain situations and in other cases it has not. For example it has stopped some people from getting married and realizing that lust was the premise of their relationship. On the flip side it has made someone overlook a person that they would overall be compatible with but since pre-marital sex was not in the equation, they looked past the person. The age of when people get married has changed as well.

 

Nowadays it is common for people to get married in their 30’s, unlike in the past most people were married with children in their 20’s. Sex has become a big emphasis in our society, rather than religion where premarital sex is forbidden. This factor makes it tougher for people to abstain until marriage. A majority of the things that you see in the multimedia platform of our society has a sexual innuendo to it. Another makes it difficult in your case because the men in your age range are going through their sexual prime so they may not be looking to settle at that point of their lives.

 

Look at yourself as a diamond in the ruff and be open to receiving a gem for a lifetime partner. There are men out there that will respect the fact you want to save yourself for marriage and will see your value beyond sex. Since you are a Christian woman, a good place to look for man who will value that is at Church. That’s not saying that you can’t find men elsewhere that will honor that but they can relate where you are coming from. Be patient and you will find someone that will appreciate you. Good Luck, TBM

ConversationswitCoyfee presents A Man’s Point View: What is True Love?

In A Man's Point Of View, A man's Version of the Dating Game, Dating and the Single Woman, expressing her support for the troops as they prepared to invade Iraq, Forgiveness, Spiritual healing, Uncategorized, What is True Love?, women talk on August 8, 2009 at 11:38 am

Hi Guys and Gals..

I have been pondering the same thing.  This peace submitted by one of my close friends is an interesting topic. LOVE..I must be honest and share that I think I have been chasing it all of my adult life. LOVE..someone to hold me when I am scare..someone to caress me when I am lonely..someone to assure me that all will be well when I am uncertain..someone to be amazed by every inch of me..adoring the very dimples on even my thighs..(I am a big girl) smile..

I have hoped that one day a man will enter my life and be the missing link but until then I live..to the fullest..not down trotten..not angry..not forgetting to every breath as a gift from God. I will live everyday to the absolute fullest..if that MAN never arrives..I will have lived everyday to the absolute extreme..AND Love should it tarry will be a welcome guess in my home…

For now the LOVE of GOD is usual and eternal. He never stops loving us even when we forget that He is there..

Coyfee signing off…

What is True Love?

Posted on August 6, 2009 by theoraclemag

love canvasWhat we could use in the world today more then anything else is love. True love, real love. If mankind had authentic love for one another, war, world hunger, homelessness, abuse, crime and so on would all come to an end. Love begins and ends with GOD. He is the author. It was created by him and out of his nature. When we, as Christians were filled with the Holy Spirit, he gave us the spirit of love as a gift. It is his desire that we share this gift with all that we come in contact with. We are most like GOD when we show love. In truth The Bible records the greatest love story ever written, GOD’s unconditional love for his that sent his “Sun” to die on the cross (John 3:16; 1 John 4:10).

Love is more then attribute of GOD. It is in fact apart of his nature (Dueut. 7:7-8). According to the Bible “GOD is love,” that is he is the personification of love (1 Jn 4:8, 16). This type of love out reaches human understanding (Eph. 3:19). The love of GOD is everlasting (Jer. 31:3), free (Hos. 14:4) sacrificial (Jn 3:16), and enduring to the end (Jn 13:1).

In GOD’s Word there are two different Greek words that mean “to love.” The word phileo means “to have ardent affection and feeling,” a brotherly love. This is why Phillidphia is known as “the city of brotherly love.” The word “agapao” means “to have esteem or high regard”

GOD blessed Each of us with spiritual gifts. Shamefully many of us use these gifts to glorify ourselves. According to 1 Corinthians 13:2 this has nothing to do with love. But then in verse 3 of the same chapter Paul teaches that giving with out true love is pointless. If we give to feed our pride, we are giving in vain!

Remember we said “GOD is love” and love is his nature. 1 Cor. 13: 4-7 list the Characteristics of love which so happen to be the characteristics of GOD. Love “is patient,” meaning it suffers long with people.; no matter the evil and the injury done by a person; no matter the neglect from a loved one, without anger. Love “is kind,” meaning it is good, helpful and giving. It does not hurt. Love does not envy; it does not get Jealous. Love does not boast; does not brag or seek honor or recognition. Love is not proud or arrogant and conceited. It’s not about thinking your better then others. Love is not rude. It is full of order and control. It does not shame itself. Love is not self seeking, meaning its not selfish. It seeks to serve. Love is not easily angered, not ready to take offense. Not “touchy.” Love keeps no record of wrongs, does not consider the wrong suffered. It suffers the evil done to it and forgets it Love does not delight in evil or take pleasure of the sin of others Love rejoices when the truth is rooted and grounded in a person and among all people. Love Protects and bears all things. The Word protects or bears means both to cover all things and to bear up under all things. Love always trusts. It is completely trusting. It accepts and believes the very best about a person Love always hopes; it never stops hoping. It expects the good to eventfully triumph. Love always preserves. The word preserves is a military word meaning to stand against the attack of an enemy. Love is strong and full of fight.

But are you full of Love?