ConversationswitCoyfee

Posts Tagged ‘What is a woman’

ConversationswitCoyfee presents Sista2Sista’s Discussion Of The Week:Do Black Men Like Their Women Larger?

In A Man's Point Of View, A man's Version of the Dating Game, Do Black Men Like Their Women Larger?, Uncategorized, women talk on August 30, 2009 at 5:02 am

This is Coyfee..I want to know what’s your opinion ..black men talk to me..

I must admit the world gives double imagines all the time, but what do the men say? Is thick In and Thin the has been Or is Thin in and Thick over way too quick..here is my body shot..sporting my African derriere.  I tried some of everything to get rid of it..now it seems like having what your momma gave you is in…You tell me..

 tammie body shot

Opinion: Do Black Men Like Their Women Larger?

 By Hello Beautiful August 27, 2009 4:52 pm (from thegrio.com)

 I posed this question on a social networking site recently. The aftermath was like watching people running from a burning building as if their hair were on fire. Most of the responses were of the “good luck with that” variety, as if the next move was to wait for a last minute pardon from the governor before the firing squad commenced to carry out the sentence.

 

The reason for some of my own hesitation in weighing in on a subject like this is obvious. Just as the black women come in a variety of hues and hair types, they also are a mix of skinny and voluptuous – the thin and the thick – not so easily or quickly defined. Nor can the dating or marrying preferences of African-American men be easily placed into a nice neat box.

 

 Poll a brother on the street and he might be just as likely to prefer a slim sister as one with, as they say, some junk in her trunk. Serena Williams: “My Thighs Are Too Big” Still, there’s no question that the average African-American woman is likely to adopt India.Arie’s credo that she just “ain’t built like a supermodel.” And if the biggest part of sexiness is self-confidence, then the black woman’s allure to the black man needs no explanation. The black woman exudes self-assuredness. Since her arrival here from Africa centuries ago, the black woman has been comfortable in her skin, content to live her life large, usually more literally than figuratively.

 In many cases, because the African-American woman bore the responsibility – often alone – for keeping her family intact, she had little time to take care of herself. Even if that lifestyle wasn’t – or nowadays, isn’t – a choice, we’re nonetheless seeing the effects in higher reported incidents of obesity and related complications, including diabetes and heart disease, within the black community. This week’s news that the American Heart Association added sugar, along with salt and cholesterol, to the list of things to watch out for will not go over well in many black kitchens. While there are legitimate health reasons for wondering if bigger is really better over the long term, those concerns haven’t kept many black women from straying from the ideal European-American body aesthetic that is widely portrayed in the media circles. You need only look at the way two of the world’s top female tennis players, Maria Sharapova and Serena Williams, are viewed to get a feel for the chasm of difference in how body beauty is perceived in the black and white communities. Sharapova, a Russian émigré and winner of three Grand Slam singles titles, is 6-foot-2, thin and blonde. Twice, she was the most searched for athlete in the world through Yahoo! and she is a favorite of the overwhelmingly white fanboy sports blogosphere. Williams is likewise tall, at 5ft 10″, but as author Marita Golden points out in her book, “Don’t Play in the Sun: One Woman’s Journey Through the Color Complex,” “Serena is compact, muscular [and] built for the game she dominates.”

 

“And,” continues Golden, “any discussion of Serena Williams has to begin with her backside, her black, her African, derriere. That’s my backside, that’s the backside of so many black women, and Serena ain’t trying to hide it, camouflage it or do anything but flaunt it.” Serena’s not alone, nor should she be. You won’t catch women like Tyra Banks or Oprah Winfrey or Queen Latifah squeezing into size 2 or 4 dresses. Yet their visibility and beauty are unquestioned. Indeed, I appreciate the fact that my wife not only isn’t built like a supermodel, but loves me, a man who not only has junk in the trunk, but groceries all over the car.

ConversationswitCoyfee presents A Man’s Point Of View: Why Women Cheat

In A Man's Point Of View, A man's Version of the Dating Game, Adulterous women, Ask the black man, Dating and the Single Woman, Uncategorized, What is True Love?, Why Women Cheat on August 30, 2009 at 4:20 am

Well folks what do you say? Do you agree with the writer? Why do women cheat? Is it that some women want their cake and to eat it too..

Let me know what you think?

Coyfee signing off

 

A Man’s Response To Why Women Cheat Posted Aug 18

So, I’m reading this article on the ‘Hello Beautiful’ site titled, 3 Reasons Why Women Cheat, and I have decided to give you women some advice based on what I have read:

 Feeling Lonely in a Relationship

Ok, realize that men sometimes go through this as well so it’s not gender based when it comes to feeling lonely. The expectations placed on a man while in a relationship should be discussed as opposed to being expected, ESPECIALLY if your man happens to be popular or very driven when it comes to his career or work. If you are feeling lonely, it is up to you to include him in other activities that he may not normally be involved in where you wouldn’t feel so lonely. Also, keep in mind that, just like women, guys like to hang out with the fellas every now and then, so if your expectations are greater than he is willing to give, then you may have to resort to the infamous female support group! Otherwise, occupy your time with your passion and goals so that way when the two of you DO get up, the time together will be cherished even more while both of you are trying to achieve personal goals and dreams!

 

Feeling Taken for Granted

 As stated above, men go through the motions when feeling like they are also taken for granted. But instead of focusing on the negative, focus on the positive and as with any relationship, whether work, play or friendship, this can be a task. But as with any task, there has to be common ground so that it can be completed to satisfaction! What most women tend to do is focus on their needs and themselves when having a conversation about ‘us’. You also need to be open to hearing and catering to his needs and wants as well so that way BOTH of you can be equally fulfilled! I hate to word it like this but, it has to be a mutually binding agreement so that way no one feels taken for granted, you give a little, I give a little and hopefully, we both benefit greatly!

 

You Are Leading Separate Lives

Well, as with anything in life, you grow, sometimes together, sometimes apart. It should be the focus of both partners to extend themselves to each other so that way both of you are still on the same page when it comes to a common bond which should be love. We can’t help who we are or who we become based on life experiences and what most women (and men!) don’t understand is that it is BECAUSE of you that he decides to take another direction in life, whether negative or positive. We should make each other stronger but at times, we tend to get weak out of being used to being with the one we are with, so we can and do get complacent. So, communication may be the most important tool in this situation so you can understand what the other is going through in order to want to stay in each others live! You can lead a separate, yet together life if both parties are getting what they want out of it, specifically on an emotional level. But you MUST discuss it with each other!

 

Revenge Can Be Bittersweet

This is definitely a hard thing for women and ESPECIALLY men! Since society accepts cheating men more than they accept cheating women, we, as men, are distraught when we find out that our woman has cheated, even if we were caught first. Hey, don’t blame us; society has made it acceptable for us to get away with cheating! Nonetheless, if it’s within a marriage, when you take your vows, you said for better or for worse, so you must remember that when you do find out as we, as men, have to think along the same lines. As far as a lover, I would say it should be based on what is transpiring in the relationship as to why the cheating was done and if it can be, not only forgiven, but placed aside for the good of the relationship.

 

The Ego Needs Stroking

As far as ego, I can safely say that the male ego is more robust than a woman’s ego, so we are at a disadvantage when it comes to that, especially if we are attractive or have a status or have money or have all three! Women are always eyeing us, trying to get our attention and with the slightest bit of neglect from you, make it easier to submit to the desires of a woman who is obviously trying to give us the goods. So, if anything, if our egos need stroking, guess what, something else of ours will get the stroking.

ConversationswitCoyfee presents It’s Time to Laugh

In Men Pregnant-What?, Uncategorized on July 29, 2009 at 12:58 am

Morning Folks..How is everyone? I hope the weekend was really good to you. My weekend was quite interesting. My daughter and I visited one of my friends and we now have wonderful new family to share with. Well enough of my exciting life; let me share a wonderfully amusing story with you. The below story is about a man that recieved an assignment from his employer.

Coyfee signing off…Laugh real hard folks..but if men could really get pregnant, how many would? Hmmmm  (Smile)

 (Parenting.com) — After my wife had given birth to our second child, my editor at BabyTalk called me with an assignment: See what it’s like to be pregnant by wearing an “empathy belly” — a sort of pregnancy suit for men (expectant dads try them on briefly during childbirth class) — for one day. One man straps on a fake pregnancy belly and has a rough time. Having just gone through nine months of backaches, nausea, and sore feet herself, my wife, Susan, was all too thrilled for me to have a taste of her discomfort, if only for a day. Full of bravado, I insisted that I would also wear the belly at night, so that I’d have it on a full 24 hours. That was before we learned that the makers of the empathy belly suggest wearing it no longer than three hours at a time. (Something to do with not wanting the husband to freak out by the instant changes, collapse, and suffocate, I believe.) I borrowed my 33-pound empathy belly from the College of Nursing at the University of Cincinnati. It’s not just a belly though: The contraption consists of two foam breasts; a rib belt designed to constrict the lungs and make it harder to breathe; two seven-pound lead balls inside the belly; a two-pound suspended weight that simulates a baby’s kicking; and a weighted pouch that represents the baby’s head on the woman’s — or in my case, man’s — bladder. No ‘big’ deal I decided to give my new breast-and-belly suit a whirl on a weekend. On Saturdays, I try to give my wife a break by taking our two girls — Isabelle, 2, and Lorelei, 3 months — to visit my parents. This day wasn’t any different, save for the empathy belly in the trunk of the car (you’re not allowed to drive while wearing it).

Parenting.com: Myths about pregnancy sex Don’t Miss Parenting.com: The real poop on labor Parenting.com: Our favorite pregnancy movies Parenting.com: Girl or boy? Fun ways to guess I thought it would be helpful to spend some time outside my own home wearing the belly to truly understand how a pregnant woman feels. But I also knew deep down that I’d probably conveniently forget to mention to my parents that I had brought it along. Fortunately, my wife had sent over an e-mail reminding everyone. In another lucky break, my parents had a friend visiting, Debbie, who, along with my mom, was all too happy to help me put on the empathy belly. As soon as they strapped on the rib belt (giggling all the while), I felt frighteningly short of breath. And when I sat down on the sofa, I immediately felt an acutely uncomfortable sensation — the bladder pouch. Parenting.com: Wackiest, grossest pregnancy symptoms “It’s not so bad,” I said, glancing at my mother and Debbie, who both seemed to be euphoric about my plight. But after the novelty wore off a little, the two launched into a conversation related to work. I remained on the sofa, taking note that yes, I had some slight pressure on my bladder, and sure, I couldn’t take deep, deep breaths, but this wasn’t so tough. It’s not like I feel that different than before, I thought, absently fondling my fake breasts. In front of my mom. I yanked my hands away and tried to pry myself off of the sofa. Immediately, Isabelle asked me to pick her up. “Oh, jeez,” I muttered, squatting down. The empathy belly instructions are adamant that you shouldn’t bend down without squatting; I didn’t want to test my luck. As I lifted her, other than a brief puzzled glance, Isabelle didn’t even seem to notice my misshapen body, which was a big relief. (After I accepted this assignment, I worried that when Isabelle grew up, she would have a foggy memory of her father with a pregnant belly, keeping a therapist employed for years.) My 2-year-old was just happy I was holding her — which meant one of us was happy.

After all, she’s 31 freaking pounds. “You seem kind of cranky,” my mother said. “It must be my hormones,” I sighed. I looked at my watch. I had only been wearing the empathy belly for 15 minutes, and I knew I should go at least another hour or two. I didn’t want to admit it to anybody, but, by this point, I wasn’t enjoying my pregnancy at all. Parenting.com: Boy or girl? Fun ways to guess Fortunately, everybody else was. My mother and Debbie kept making jokes at my expense. My brother, Kevin, and his girlfriend, Rachel, dropped by and each had a good laugh. And my dad took photos. I probably logged in about 90 more minutes, and three bathroom trips, until I’d had enough. When I arrived home with the girls, my wife was beaming. “Your father sent me the photos,” she said. Cursed e-mail. I wasn’t mad at my dad for sending the photos. But I was mad at him for telling Susan that I had said, “Wearing this empathy belly is much more difficult than actually being pregnant.” My wife quickly replied, “Tell Geoff that if he likes, he can try being pregnant for five minutes, and he will see how comfortable the empathy belly is.” And then she reeled off a list of things that the empathy belly would never do, like “give you insomnia, give you hemorrhoids, and make you push a baby out of an opening the size of a lemon.” She also took issue with the fact that I could take the empathy belly off at any time and leave it in a box. Boy, she’s touchy. Labor pains The next day, my wife, daughters, and I went back to my parents’ house for lunch, where the main course was my grandmother’s fried chicken. Not two minutes into the visit, my wife was volunteering to help me put on the belly. Susan yanked the rib belt around my chest much tighter than my mother and her friend had. “Comfy?” Susan asked. “I cuhnnn-n-huhhly-breathe,” I said. “Then I guess it’s working,” Susan said cheerfully. If the experience was strange the day before, now it was surreal. My Uncle Joe was annoyed that I was sitting beside him, because I seemed to take up all of the space around me. My Uncle Larry just appeared amused. As did my brother, his girlfriend, my parents and my wife. At least my grandmother seemed supportive. Until, that is, after dinner, when she looked my way and offered a challenge: “I’ll bet you can’t tie your shoes.” Et tu, Grammy?

 Birth of a new appreciation I retreated upstairs with Isabelle for a while. She played in my old bedroom, and at one point, I tried lying on my side, imagining what it might be like to sleep like that for an entire night. Honestly, I’m not sure how any woman does it. Watching Isabelle play, I had some time to reflect on a lot of things, like how lonely pregnancy can feel. I mean, sure, you’re a celebrity for a while — Susan got a lot of attention from the family when she was pregnant, and I was getting a lot, in a different sort of way. But at the same time, if you’re the only pregnant person in the room, and the only person who has to think about how to navigate across the room, well, there’s a sense of solitude to the whole thing. And helplessness. When Isabelle and I were going downstairs, she wanted me to carry her, but I was worried about tackling the stairs with my arms full of preschooler. I shouted for my father, who came to Isabelle’s rescue while I retreated to the restroom for probably the fifth time since we had arrived. But when I finished my business and reached down to zip my pants, my belly kept getting in the way. Grunting, I pulled and pulled, until I finally placed my fake stomach on the counter, bent my knees, and tried to pull. I wound up toppling into the bathtub. I stood, holding up my pants with one hand, gingerly descended the stairs, and snuck into my parents’ den. I tried putting my belly on my father’s desk, which was a little higher than the bathroom counter. Still no luck. Sweat was dripping off of me now, and my forearms were aching — all from trying to zip my pants. After about five minutes of struggling, I gave in and called for Susan. This was a two-person job. “I don’t know how you zipped your pants all those months,” I said. “Maternity pants don’t come with zippers,” she replied. “That’s right,” I said. “You know, maybe I do have it harder than you did.” My wife shot me a look implying I was sleeping in the garage that night. Later, Susan softened, and shortly before the three-hour limit was up, she suggested I take the belly off. I didn’t protest. I waddled a mile in her moccasins, and I have to admit, I have a new respect for all pregnant women. I especially have to admire women who repeat the pregnancy experience. Susan’s actually talking about going for a third. There are times when I think she’s crazy, until I’m making Lorelei laugh, or lying in the grass with Isabelle, marveling at how she can watch an ant and be simply fascinated by it. (That is, until she tries to pet it, and accidentally sends it into oblivion.)

 There’s something about having kids that really is magical. And so, I can honestly say that if it was possible for men to be pregnant, and if I had to trade places with my wife, I would happily go the distance for nine months.

By Geoff Williams

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Parenting.com

What makes a woman.. A woman.

In Spiritual healing, Uncategorized, women talk on July 3, 2009 at 12:49 pm

beautyWhat makes a woman..a woman

 

Hi Family!

 I hope everyone is doing fine.  It has been a little while since we shared.  However, I have been hard at work to locate the next artist for an interview. In the meantime I have been pondering an age old question.  What is the question you ask? 

Well, “What makes a woman a woman?” Are you smiling while reading that title? Do you think that you know the answer?  Yes, go ahead and tell me the answer, please. One person said the curves that define femininity.. The curves from the bottom up to the breast..Oh you mean, those curves the ones that won’t let a man’s mind rest…Well that’s a good answer but not what I was looking for. See some time ago..Men began to sculpt their bodies to look just like or in many cases better than the average woman..So the curvy figure isn’t all that’s need to make a woman a woman.

indian womanAnyone else has any suggestions?  A visitor in corner yells…”The gentle touch…” Yes! Well there are some males whose hands feel like a baby’s bottom.”  Someone walking by blurted out “The soft sweet voice that creates a melody as a baby is serenaded”.  Well let us see…I know some women whose voice are as deep as the ocean’s blue and some men whose voice is as high as evaporated dew. So the sound or pitch of one’s voice does not make a woman a woman.  Does anyone one else?

There is but one thing that makes a woman a woman. It is the womb gifted to her by GOD. A man can alter his appearance from head to toe. He can become Josephine and no longer be known as Joe. He can raise the pitch of his voice from the ocean’s deep to the height of the mountain’s peak.  He could change his special design so he is no longer the depositor but the receiver. He still can never be a woman. He can change his appearance, the sound of his voice, and the intimacies of his hidden treasure and still he can’t be a woman. Please understand I do not stand in judgment of any soul that changes his birth imagine…I only share with you..What God shared with me…That He who is the creator of all living made a woman…a woman.

The woman is a womb-man because God took her out of man and gave her the ability to bear life. What an honor ladies, to be able to bear life. 

He crafted her to entice man and to comfort him, to nurture him as he rests his head against her breast. To be his biggest hoorah and his strongest advocate.  She, woman was not crafted to parade her nudity or expose her secret treasures. God designed her, woman, to satisfy the man he crafted her for. Not for all to see and lust for her but to only entice and then satisfy that one man..The one God designed her for…Her soul mate…

The one thing that makes a woman a woman…Our God design…Like it, Love it, Want to give it back…That is what makes a woman a woman…Her womb-the God design